Dear Aunty Aurora,
I am 30 years old and a single mum of three kids I had with three different men. I will go straight to the point. As unbelievable as it may sound, I love being married. I make sure that each time I meet someone who is interested in me, we get married within a minimum of six months.Though my three attempts at marriages all ended the same way, I really love being in a committed relationship. I just met the man I believe will be my fourth and last husband, but my mum who happens to live with me and my kids. She thinks its too soon to get into another relationship because my last marriage only lasted a year. I really do think this new man is the one for me, but please how do I convince my mother to support me because I really do value her opinion and don’t want my decision to come between us.
Sandra. Port-Harcourt. Dear Sandra,
Your story is quite interesting and for someone who claims to love being married, three marriages is a little bit on the high side for someone your age to have gone through. My advice might not really make you happy but believe me honey, it is in your best interest. I might not know anything about the type of men you have been married to or even you personally, but I can see that something needs fixing before you think of settling down with another person. Marriage is a serious business coupled with the fact that you already have three kids you have to look out.
I am guessing they are still quite young and putting them through the process of having to bond and un-bond with the different people you marry may just be too much for them. Its good to want a stable relationship and a home but marriage is not the only place you can fulfil this needs and you don’t even need to have a partner to be happy. Have you also thought of the reasons behind your marriage crashes? Maybe its time you do some self-assessment and see if the problem is you or you always pick the wrong men. I am not saying you should rule out marriage entirely, I think you need a breather like your mum has said. Get to know yourself better and really evaluate what you want from any new relationship. If the new man really cares about you, he will understand your need to take things slow and respect your decision. All the best dear.
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Dear Aunty Aurora,