Ladies, especially those who are married or cohabiting, how do you handle finances in the house?
This is one area that needs Solomon’s wisdom, otherwise things will fall apart, not only in Chinua Achebe’s book but also in your house. Unless, of course, you have a partner who is one of those extraordinary humans from heaven but found themselves on earth.
You know the way we were brought up knowing that the man is the head of the house? So many women have let that sink into their systems such that they will never use their cash to settle bills in the house – even when all they need to use is common sense!
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We have women who will sit in the dark house because the prepaid electricity meter had ran out. They have the money to buy petrol for the generator or top-up the meter but since ‘the man is the head of the house’, they will sit and wait for the man to get back home and buy the petrol or top-up the light. My sister, give yourself brain…I mean, ladies, how can you be so mean to yourself?
Another one was comfortable being locked out of their house because they had rent arrears yet she had enough money to bail out the situation. In her mind, that was supposed to be done by her husband and not her. She packed her bags and went to ‘mark time’ at a friend’s house as she waited for the husband to regain his financial muscle and save the situation.
We are not going to blame any of these ladies yet because they probably have never been educated on what really happens in a marriage setting. Some Naija babes with money in their savings will go hungry just because their husband had not given them any cash for foodstuff or house upkeep.
They’ll sit at home staring at empty pots and waiting for the jar of oil to multiply like the biblical shunammite woman or just waiting for oga to get back home from work so that he could give them some cash to get some food.
Keep in mind they sat there hungry! Babes let us clearly explain what marriage, bills and money entails. If you can allow Oga to be at the top and empty the content of his ball-sack inside you, then the least you should worry about is using 1000 naira to buy food for the house. Now this goes out to all the women who ride on the ‘a man is the head of the house’ line to make other humans suffer. This is the time to rise above such reasoning and embrace some togetherness.
No need sitting pretty as your children stare at a blank TV because the subscription has expired and only your man can renew it. By the way, why do women act like if we settle any bill in the house, we have done the occupants a favour? Isn’t that your house too?!
Then we have those who will settle the bill but then later ask for a refund from their men. Sometimes don’t you look at some good men and wish to give them all a group hug. These humans go through a lot. Imagine your wife paying school fees for your child then coming to claim it from you.
Some even pay the fees and make an arrangement with the children to lie that they still have arrears so that their fathers can give them the money and they in turn take it back to their mothers! God will forgive us all.
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You all should realise Jesus did not die for this. If you have money and a situation arises and you are in a position to save face, do it. So what if your husband never regains his financial stability? Will you stay hungry forever? We are all fighting Corona, let’s not make it any harder for our men.
Let’s lend a helping hand. After all, aren’t we in love with them? If you aren’t in love or can’t sacrifice for him, then you should not be with him. If he isn’t worthy of your money, then he isn’t worthy of you. Simples!Photo Credit: Getty