Dear Aunty Aurora,
I am a Christian and I happen to be in love with a married man and a father of two. He has always insisted he is deeply in love with me as he also broke my virginity. We have had this relationship for three years and now we have a 9-month-old baby. Despite numerous inquiries from my family, I have kept details about him secret because I don’t want the embarrassment of having a child with a married man.
I want to walk out of this relationship but he will not let me. He always says how much he loves me and that I satisfy his desires. I don’t know what to do, as I have also never been with another man. Please advise me. Thanks Shade, Ikoyi-Lagos.
What happened has happened and unfortunately, that is the reality, you are going to have to deal with it for the rest of your life. You fell in love with a married man and went ahead and had a child with him. While there is quite a lot of stigma surrounding that in our society, we cannot run away from the fact that it is happening. Accept what you cannot change and get a way of dealing with it.
About your family members, this is fairly easy. They will always keep asking about it until the day you tell them what is really going on here. I don’t know his stand on this matter but from your description, he seems not to have a problem with you and the baby. It is about time you came clean and told the story. You don’t have to tell everyone everything, but present him to your family members, make it clear he is the father of your child and leave it at that. Once you get this done, you will put this whole matter to rest.
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