Every Nigerian guy is bound to come to that disappointing point in life where he find out that the lady he has been building a fantasy kingdom with in his mind has been cheating on him all along.
It is indeed a traumatising moment as it has pushed some guys to commit murder or suicide. Some guys had to go through years of emotional withdrawal before they eventually came out of the pains while some others made life changing decisions about the way they handle ladies that eventually made them a living nightmare to any lady that crossed their path.
The five steps below will guide you on how to act, react and think when you find yourself in this traumatising point in life:
1. Don’t react immediately: Naturally all guys are bound to be struck by three feelings at once when they find out about their partner’s infidelity. The feelings are: Betrayal, Disappointment and Anger. The third emotion included here is the most lethal of the three. It is unpredictable, irrational and unlimited. It can turn the scenario to a murder scene in the blink of an eye. You must learn to tame these three emotions, or at least, the last of the three.
2. Decide if you want to continue the relationship: You have to think deeply over the future of your relationship with the cheater. Do you want to hold on? Do you think she will do it again? Did she cheat because she was tired of the relationship? and most importantly, Do you think you can forgive her? You need to ask yourself these questions before making your final decision. Be very careful not to allow the spur of a moment ruin the beautiful relationship you have been having for years.
3. Understand her reason for cheating on you: Though you can’t pin a logical reason to an act like cheating, you need to think deeply over her reason for cheating on you. Who knows, it might be because of a similar offence that you committed/ it might also be because of your extremely close relationship with a female friend that made her jealous.
4. Demand an immediate termination of all forms of communication with the third party: A truly sorry lady will make this move even before you ask her to do it. You need to ensure that she break off her friendship with the third party. This is a non-negotiable move. If she refuse to break it off, then you need to end your relationship with her immediately.
5. Draw a line on her relationship with other guys: I am not saying she should cut them off completely. But she need to set a boundary on her relationship with other guys, to avoid re-inventing the wheel. Keeping late nights in another guys house is forbidden. She need to reduce her relationship with other guys to mere casual greetings, at least till your relationship is back on its feet again.
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