Dear Aunty Aurora: I have been having sex with another man to get even with my husband after he told me all the things he’d done behind my back. It was wrong and immature and I love my husband but I am beginning to wonder if our marriage will work.
I am 29 and my husband is 39. We have been together for five years and married for four. We have a lovely son who is three. We both work full-time and have a home but after almost a year of arguing, and being kicked out of the house and moving backwards and forwards to my parents, I’d had enough. During a row, my husband told me about all the things he has done behind my back and I thought I would play him at him own game.
I ended up having sex with a man I met through work and continued to see him a few more times over a couple of weeks. I am beginning to wonder whether this relationship can work. I love my husband so much but it’s hard to forget what he has put me through. At the moment it feels as though I am just around for my son’s sake. I couldn’t imagine him growing up and me not being there, guiding him through his life. Thanks, Yetunde, Yaba, Lagos.
Dear Yetunde, This is a horrible atmosphere to live in but, as you realise, cheating to get even isn’t the answer. Try to make your marriage work for your son’s sake. Your little boy’s life will never be the same again if you end your marriage but all this rowing is bad for him too.
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