Friday, December 9, 2022

Aunty Aurora: Is It Okay To Take Him Back Even Though He Cheated?

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Dear Aunty Aurora,
Back in 2015 I broke up with my ex because I felt he was cheating on me emotionally. He had this female friend who he was constantly on the phone with and even though he claimed they were just friends, I just felt it wasn’t right. Several times I would tell him that I wasn’t comfortable with the bond he had with girl and every single time, he would say I was just feeling insecure for no reason. Eventually I got tired of feeling like I was in a relationship with two people and broke-up with him. Not long after, I met another guy and we started dating. I felt like I was finally where I need to be. He showered me with affection and I had all his attention or so I thought. Eventually I found out that he played me well because asides myself, he was seeing two other ladies. When I found out I decided that I would just be by myself instead of dating guys who were only out to use me. Now the guy I broke up with in 2015 is back claiming to be a changed person and I am just so confused. Should I take the risk and go back? After all the devil you know is better than the angel you don’t.
Clarice. Ogba.

Dear Clarice,
Being with a cheating partner leaves you feeling like you are doing something wrong and you are to blame for your partner’s behaviour. Be it physical or emotional, cheating should not be encouraged. The thing with cheating is you can never be too sure if the cheating partner is truly changed or just hiding their bad ways better than before, so trust is broken.
On the other, I can’t really say much for your first boyfriend who you believed to be emotionally involved with the other lady. There are various degrees to which this could have happened. Was he sharing details about your relationship with her? Was he discussing inappropriate topics either on the phone or through text with her? Or was he simply just spending too much time talking to her than you felt was necessary. He might have truly changed because its been two years, though I wonder what he was doing in those two years. Did he try out a relationship with the other girl which failed and now wants to get back together with you? You need to ask questions and verify his claims and that is only if you really still care about him enough to give him a second chance.
Photo Credit: Getty

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