Dear Aunty Aurora,
I have a problem. I think I need urgent help. I am 26 and I have always found myself dating women who are older than me. In my life, I have never dated a younger girl.
I find older women more attractive and interesting to be with and many times they also seem happy and contented with the relationship. I think I am getting addicted to older women and think it is time I started thinking about a long term relationship. I want to date ladies that are younger than me but I find it hard to leave the older ones. Please advise me. Thank you. Kunle- Shomolu
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Dear Kunle,
This issue is not entirely unique. It has been around for ages and is not about to go away. Older women are always an irresistible allure for younger men for many reasons. Your situation would not be an exception except for the fact that you have never dated a lady who is younger than you.
In a relationship like yours (going against the norm) you are generally much younger than the women you date. So we could explore why such relationships exist and why they are extremely intriguing for men.
For starters, younger women are usually more demanding of time and other resources. Often, they will also be fairly judgmental of the man’s status and achievements. This is pretty much in order because women are configured to size up men that are interested to know if they are capable of taking care of them and in future their children.
However, older women will be more accommodating and less judgmental of suitable mates because they may not be looking for the things that a young lady is looking for and they do not want to have your baby which is quite reassuring for a young man. They will also be relatively stable and successful so they have their day-to-day needs taken care of unlike a young girl who will be concerned about this.
Another common reason men prefer older women is they are not looking for commitment. This is rather intriguing for young men as it relieves them of the worry that she will want to drag him to her parents seven days after getting intimate with him and shortly immediately thereafter down the aisle.
Not to mention that in some of these relationships will have a pack of goodies to go with it that include money, gifts and occasionally they will let you drive their flashy car.
This is not a sustainable practice as you will soon need to settle down and build yourself up. I can assure you that as a man, it is practically impossible to build yourself up on the back of a woman. A man has to find his way around this life to support and build a woman, not the other way round.
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