Dear Aunty Aurora: I think I might have caused the breakup of my lovely family. I had passionate sex at work with a colleague who made me feel young again – so young that I told my wife to get out of my life. But now my lover doesn’t want to know.My wife is 35 and we have 3 children. She has been accessing my social media accounts and insisting I shut them down. She doesn’t let me go out with friends either. I’m 38 and started going to a my local gym a year ago, just to keep fit. I got to know the receptionist at the gym girl and I used to fantasise about us getting together. She’s 28 and gorgeous.A job came up at my office and I asked her to apply and she managed to get it. I then saw this girl every day. She could not believe it, when I told her I have a wife but we’d still flirt and text each other. She’s the opposite of my wife – kind, shy, socially awkward and inexperienced but so attractive. Seeing her reminded me of the person I used to be. We spent an evening at her flat when I told my wife I was working late. We just talked and eat pepper soup. I must admit, I offered her sex and she turned me down. But we did end up doing it the next day. It felt so real and exciting. I told my wife to leave soon after that. She was refusing to go so I told her I had met someone else and i’m going to have her as my second wife. My wife did not want to have a second wife, so she packed her bag and went to his mother’s with the kids. In a panic, I sent a long text to the girl from work, spelling everything out and perhaps saying too much. I think she was scared my wife would come after her so her text back to me read: “Just leave me out of it and stay away from me.” I don’t love my wife but why should I throw my marriage away for somebody who doesn’t love me back? Thanks. Adekunle, Yaba, Lagos.Dear Adekunle, Your colleague may have been a much-needed catalyst to help you find the courage to stand up to address any issues you have with your wife and in your marriage. Maybe your lover isn’t going to commit to you but why go back into an unhappy marriage and what have you done to resolve issues with your wife? Better to be single for a while and let the reality of you being with your family hit you to realise, how much they mean to you. How has your wife reacted to the split?Photo Credit: Getty
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